The List (edited)

***Author’s note: I updated this post on December 7, 2010. This past baseball season taught me that #1 on the second list made me a hypocrite, so I revamped it. I also edited some others.***

I ran across this great site via another great site via yet another great site. It was ex-site-ing. HAHAHAAA!! Ahem. Sorry.

It all started with Stuff Christians Like. That led to Single and Sane. Then, that led to Mama Kat.

The link to Single and Sane is the inspiration for this post. Mama Kat has a page of writing prompts that I wish I found when I was trying to do the post a day in May (major fail). That’s beside the point. Mama Kat challenged her readers to make a list of 50 things they look for in a man. Just read the Single and Sane article for her reaction. It was a little like mine, so I’m going to shorten it, too.

I don’t know of anyone who has ever called me picky. I do know that a lot of people have told me that I have to wait until I get my doctorate to get married. If I went by that, it could end up that I won’t ever get married. Am I stalling?

There aren’t 50. Well, I don’t know. There may be, but I doubt it. These aren’t nit-picky things like must have chestnut-brown hair with eyes as green as a crayon and a laugh that sounds like thunder. If you would have asked me this question when I was in high school, I probably would have given you a ridiculous list like that.


OK, not really finally. A small explanation. There are some things I will not budge on:

  1. He must be a Christian. Not just by name and not just by acts. A real man with a real passion for Jesus and the things that Jesus had a passion for.
  2. We must share the same call. There’s nothing worse than one spouse feeling led to overseas missions and the other who doesn’t want to. We’re called to make disciples, and we (my, uhm, potential man and I) have to be called to do it in the same place.
  3. He must be an ever-growing man of God. His passion to know God more and more each day must outweigh His passion for me or anything else in this life.
  4. He must not be afraid to be the spiritual leader. This comes with 1-3, I believe.
  5. He must not be afraid to defend the Gospel. No matter the cost.
  6. In relation to the first one, his heart must be for those who society has deemed an outcast or unwanted.
  7. He needs a sense of humor and can appreciate mine. (I don’t know if I should move this to the second list. It sometimes seems petty to me and others it seems immovable. What do you think?)

Then, there are some that I can wiggle on and have changed over the years and will probably change over more years.

  1. He isn’t overly obsessed with video games or with sports. I do enjoy video games and sports but not so much that I sweat Mario or bleed a school’s colors. Playing a sport is different. That is perfectly fine. Honestly, I say this because I can become overly passionate about a team (The Braves or Falcons) and neglect some things that actually matter in life. I need a man who can recognize that in me and help me not drown in a sea of tomahawks and feathers.
  2. He needs to accept the fact that I like cats. He doesn’t have to love my cat or even like her because I can almost guarantee you that she won’t like him. Kicking is not permitted. He just needs to dwell in the same space as her without getting all weird.
  3. He has a strong grasp of what good grammar is. (I understand that no one is perfect. I am not perfect when it comes to grammar as I sometimes don’t care about preposition syntax. I tend to write in the passive voice and use clichés from time to time. Though, I do care for superfluous prepositions. They’re like nails on a chalk board.)
  4. He needs to have an itch for travel. Overall, I am really a homebody, but there are times when the world is calling my name.

Hm. No where near 50. I don’t think I could make it to 50 if I tried.


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4 Responses to The List (edited)

  1. Erica K says:

    So I was pretty much cracking up the entire time I read your post (well, not the list of things you won’t budge on, because that seriously made sense). I don’t think I could have 50 things on a list either…no cat kicking is good, even if the cat IS Zealand…the sense of humor thing is a must but kind of hard to explain. Sometimes opposites attract and whatnot…anyway, you made a pretty great list. I might have kept crayon-green eyes on the non-budge-able side, though.

    We both know that you will need to put your list into action, now that you’ve caught the bouquet, which is undoubtedly a divine sign from God himself that you will get married soon (if only you could hear my laughter). Let me know how that goes.

    I love you and miss you terribly and South America would be much funnier with you here,

    • Jennifer C. says:

      Hooray! Two comments in one day from Queen Erica! First, I love you and miss you terribly, too. I think about you everyday especially now that lightening struck near our house and caused our A/C to die. It’s most likely nowhere near the same as the sweltering heat there, but it’s a start.

      I am glad that you saw the humor in my post! Some people probably wouldn’t unless they knew my oh-so-lovable cat or the fact that my sense of humor is a little wacky.

      You’re right about opposites attracting. I hope I don’t end up with a super cat hating Mets fan with no working knowledge of good humor.

      I promised that I wouldn’t get married until you got back. Since things appear to be on the fast track with catching the bouquet, I’ll keep you updated. (BAHAHAHAHAAAA!!!)

      Georgia would be much funnier with you here.

      Much love,

  2. I love your list! And admitting that your cat won’t like him is both honest and terribly funny.

    I read a couple that made it to 50, but not many.

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